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Cindy Bruna at the 24th amfAR Gala Cannes at the Hotel du Cap-Eden-Roc, Antibes.
"Too much intellectualism is too boring; too much sexuality is too vulgar. The good balance makes people interested."
-Domenico Dolce
Style has become so complicated for women today; I fear we will soon look like the bourgeois characters from The Hunger Games. What has become even more complex (and terrifying) is how women are expressing their sexuality through their choice of fashion -- how they put themselves together in such a common display of truly painful desperation. This thirst for attention, validation, impersonal likes and following, has a generation or two of women conveying the appearance of sex workers. Yet, pleading publicly for the highest respect, and thankfully acknowledged for their brilliant minds.
They are under the mass misconception that bearing one's body is intrinsically connected to bearing one's soul. Perhaps within their small personal circle of sycophants, but not for the majority of the world. I must confess, I find it highly peculiar that many find it cool and "on trend" to dress like a dominatrix while posing for photos with their children, meeting heads of state, having afternoon tea, etc. The standards of decorum have honestly hit the floor.It is a shame, they announce, that men in particular cannot look past their daily erotic posts (bent over expensive vehicles in thong bikinis, half naked in pools, twerking on beds and displaying cleavage spilling out of dresses three times too small, etc.) to see how intelligent they truly are! All of these women, of course, claim to be fitness trainers. Of what discipline it's hard to surmise. For those in need of even greater admiration (and funding), many have taken their wares to Only Fans. These geniuses cannot be contained by conservative platforms.
For women seeking to add sex appeal, in the proper amount, I am here to guide you. It is natural to want to convey some level of sexiness in one's attire in the proper setting (not at your place of work, in church, sightseeing in Qatar, etc.). It is the same as wanting to highlight one's personal beauty. This is especially true of young women looking to attract a boyfriend and/or husband. There must be a healthy and safe balance.
You will charm very few suiters sitting in a bar wearing a nun's habit, and you will captivate near-to-be rapists dressed like most of the young ladies (i.e., fitness trainers) on Instagram. If the main card you hold is the sex card ladies, that is what you are going to attract. Not love or devotion, just sexual lust. Perverted beasts and bots that will fill up your DM's like a Christmas stocking. You may be in luck and find the 0.0001% of men that are interested in your Ph.D. in Physics, but most will care less if your skirt does not cover your panties.
So here are The Rules:
1. Cleavage. It is okay to show some cleavage. If you are lucky to be in possession of an ample bosom through nature or a plastic surgeon, it is a sexual asset in the competitive mating jungle. However, get out your measuring tape -- more than two inches or so of heaving bosom in a dress or shirt is too much. In bathing suits, of course, you will/can be more revealing (if you have large breasts and an ample behind there is no true hiding them at the beach). To note, if you are choosing to focus on the bosom asset, you must cover the rest. Cleavage along with a mini skirt or tight pants is overplaying the sex card. Also, if you are highlighting your cleavage, DO NOT do so in leopard or bright prints. This is très important in looking sexy, but still chic.
2. Miniskirts and little shorts. I am not a big fan of miniskirts or dressy little shorts on women, as they rarely add an elegant appeal to a woman's look. It's childlike. There are so many women in the iconic fashion history books from the 1960s to 1980s that overdid this for me. Amazing talents but made the faux pas of overdoing the sex card in fashion. The ladies of the sexual revolution, God Bless them, but now let's sit down properly in a restaurant where our cellulite is not in full display and our underwear doesn't touch the seat. If we can revolutionize bringing "ladies" back into the house, women not out to politicize their sexuality through scant clothing options -- that would be nice. Our foremothers already marched, high on marijuana, tripping on LSD, braless, half naked watching Woody Allen movies and here we are today. So, let's try it a bit different, shall we? Let's remember Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Your mini skirt should not be micro-mini EVER. Leave something to the imagination and make bending over a legal function. Also, if you are wearing a mini skirt, the entire upper part of the body should be covered, long sleeves, no cleavage. The key is to highlight ONE asset at a time. There are a few, somewhat crude but true, quotes that have stood the test of time -- "Only show a man half you ass," and "Give them the sizzle, but not the steak."
3. The Body Suit. When I was in high school this was all the craze -- the tight, bodycon Cat Girl onesie. This brings back the nostalgia of my teenage girlfriends and I illegally drinking Jack Daniels in the car, and then sauntering into Hollywood clubs with fake IDs. My heart laughs and eyes burn at the memory. Your clothing should not be that of an avatar, stuck to you like a second skin. It should have some movement and flow. Recently, I have been blinded by a few 30-something European starlets wearing head-to-toe tight clothing and it looks terribly outdated and far from elegant. The words tawdry and cheap come to mind.
4. The Cropped Top: As a woman who has spent almost her entire life in fitness, the cropped top was a standard fashion piece in my wardrobe throughout my 20s in California. However, now as I approach my 50s, I must say adieu to this look. I wore it past its prime. They say hindsight is 20-20 and it truly is. The cropped top is the domain of the fit young woman with a trim waist and can be worn with elegance in the summer months: part of a matching set, and very nice with a midi or maxi skirt.
5. The Sexy Gram: Does it occur to many young women (the half-naked bent over the hood of cars sort) that they are pornographic fodder for millions of perverts? Men with criminal records, sexual disorders and obsessions. They have become easy entertainment for the cruel and unsteady masses. Posting pictures of oneself in an overly sexual manner is not only vulgar and common, but in today's world quite dangerous. A few scattered bathing suit pictures is one thing, but an entire page devoted to your sexual assets in provocative positions is foolish. Instead of creating places of power, so many women have set themselves up as reliable prey.
As we go forward in 2023, let's class it up ladies.
